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Hashattony

Tony recites a popular meme on LolAlps

Tonius Zopfius VonHarnier, or simply known as Tony, is an alp.

Tony was born near Emden, Germany. He was stillborn, but following a breakdown his mother refused to let her first son be buried, convinced that there must be a mistake. When she pried the tiny coffin open and found her infant son "alive", the other mourners were horrified but she was delighted. Eventually it was accepted that her son was merely "ill" and the suspicions of friends and family hushed and declared ignorant superstition. Thus, Tony was raised as a normal sick child and was denied the opportunity to truly become an alp until much later in his life.

His family was fairly well off and his mother was protective and caring of her precious son, though his father seemed distant and wary of the boy.

After befriending another alp named Olaf, Tony began to be awakened to the fact that he was an alp, and eventually this lead to his being driven from his home. He lived with a group of experienced alps until Olaf was gunned down in the street by a vampire hunter who claimed the hit was on him courtesy of his mother. Tony fled in terror, hiding in the cargo of an outgoing ship. Tony used what he knew of his new powers to stay hidden on the ship, and the stowaway made it all the way to America. He spent a good few years living in various New England areas occupied by fellow Germans, so he did not have any interest in learning the English language until he had to move to a new neighborhood. He spent a good deal of time living in a condemned building until he started to get company in the form of gangs using the space as a hideout. Therefore Tony's introduction to the English language was courtesy of New York's finest gang members! Years passed and finally the building Tony lived in was destroyed, and the alp decided to travel a bit. He hitch-hiked a moving van and traveled with it to Kellwood, and after a few months some remodeling sent the alp packing once again. As luck would have it, he ran into Charby who offered him a new place to stay. Menu was a little apprehensive at first, until Tony brought a TV he acquired from his previous residence.

Tony In CTV

The beginning

Tony was first introduced in the short "Room for More", where he appeared to Charby as a skunk. Menu was uncertain about letting the alp stay until he brought in his TV with him. [1]

Not long after, he was wandering downtown when he was nearly run over by Mye. After helping her out of trouble, they went back to her magic stand and confirmed that among her scattered possessions, her wand was missing. Tony made a promise to read the thoughts of everyone in Kellwood to find out who has her wand. He brought Mye to the house house and noticed that Zeno got the same first impression as he did of her, that she was pretty cute and their height.

For the longest time, Tony was rather much an operator in the background. He enjoyed playing pranks on the other characters and being in the wrong place at the right time. Save for giving Zeno grief over his attempts at love, Tony preferred to stay in the background. He was certainly involved in heroic acts and failed romantic endeavors, but it wasn't until he started to analyze his own feelings that Tony started to step up to the spotlight in the comic.

In loves wit' Zeno's girl.

Arc Start

After Zeno really blew it with Mye, punching Crispo in the face (thus revealing that he didn't fully believe her story like he'd said he did) a remorseful Zeno went sulking about in the basement and Tony decided to tease him a bit more about how he'd blown it. But when Zeno started bawling, guilt hit Tony like a sack of bricks and he decided to help Zeno out a bit. He gave Zeno a bag of gummi bears from a snack stash he was keeping in his trunk. He gave the candies to Zeno with a suggestion of what to say to smooth things over with Mye, particularly he told him to say he just wants to see her happy. The plan worked of course, because "somebody" had been sending her bags of the candies in secret all this time, and worried Mye was concerned that it could be another unwanted admirer! But it was Zeno all along, wasn't it? Actually, it was Tony. As it turns out, he's been not-so-secretly pining after her since they met, but scaled it back for the sake of his friend Zeno who seemed to be letting his crush on Mye tear him apart. But Tony really missed the special friendship he and Mye used to share before she started dating his friend, and Tony was just now beginning to realize what he'd given up for being the good friend. He started to think about how all his relentless flirting with every available female was his way of trying to get her out of his head, but to no avail. It didn't help that they always shot him down anyway!

Always one to groan about people being too cuddly and affectionate, he started to become more obviously agitated whenever Zeno and Mye were particularly mushy together. His feelings started to affect his dreams, and he admitted the first time to himself that he loved her after some consideration of his "options".

When Zeno left with Menu to get some food, a tired Mye was left alone with him. He found her sleeping irresistible, being that he is a creature that is wont to bother people in their dreams, and considered taking a peek into her mind and perhaps giving her some good dreams *wink wink, nudge nudge, say no more!* but he stopped himself, choosing only to become emotional while staring at her from the arm of the couch, until a single teardrop of woe woke her up in a panic, smacking foreheads with the invisible alp that was hunched over her like some sort of vulture.

Mye, fully awake now, sought out some company from him, worried about the hard thump on the head she's just received.

Tony was visibly uncomfortable while keeping her company, not really knowing how to act around her since his realization of his feelings and the delicate situation of her already dating his best friend. Mye confided in him over her concerns for Zeno, and Tony tried his best to comfort her while resisting some temptations when Mye started hugging him while sobbing.

Zeno eventually returned and promised Mye a romantic picnic in the woods. Jealous Tony may not have intended to follow them out for the night, but regardless, he stumbled onto them and broke the mood by laughing at Zeno's romantic lines. He felt terrible for embarrassing Mye, but not for long because Zeno made him feel worse by taking his hat!

Tony walked home without it, and while he did his enhancements wore off, so we got a glimpse for the first time of what he really looked like. Tony sat at home waiting for their date to end so he could get back to normal. In the meantime, Foomy tried to make him feel better by telling him about his own romantic woes. Mannick tried to join the conversation but just weirded everyone out. New houseguest Crispo was getting sleepy so he asked the werewolf landlord where he could sleep. When he suggested that Zeno and Mye shack up in the same room, Tony panicked and offered up his room for Crispo to sleep in. So he'd rather share a room with another dude and sacrifice his privacy just to keep the couple from getting "too close"! Zeno finally returned with Tony's hat, a little surprised about his altered appearance, and lectured him on following him on his date. Tony tried to tell Zeno that he didn't intend to follow them, he just overheard their conversation and though Zeno was really cheesy. Zeno asked Tony if he could do any better, and Tony decided not to be honest about it and gave him a rather poor example, to which Zeno responded with much teasing, similar to how Tony himself had given him a hard time in the past. Zeno was not one to relent however, and bugged Tony about it until he "admitted" he had a crush on Fay. So Zeno tried to get Hexavier to help hook the two up, and that is when it was revealed that Hex had known about Tony's feelings for his sister this whole time, and had advised him not to "step aside" for Zeno and let Mye decide herself instead of trying to be a "good friend", pushing Zeno closer to Mye. This arc closes with Tony explaining to Crispo his feelings for Mye, and we get a look at his picture shrine with Zeno nearly cut out of the couples photos.

Master of Nightmares

Arc Start

Tony has a rather fitful night of dreams of his past and Mye. Finally he was awoken mid-dream-kiss by Remote Beast, who had become concerned about the alp. After accidentally kissing the creature, Tony decided it was a good time to wake up for the day. When he went out to the cave, he saw Mye in Bunny form looking through her potions. After having some rather vivid naughty dreams about her, he thought he'd hang back in the shadows a bit until she left, but was interrupted by Crispo who had been swimming in the reservoir with Mannick and Phineas. Crispo hadn't met "Bunny" yet was quite, shall we say, impressed by her looks. When she changed back, he asked Tony if that's why he liked her so much. Crispo started to admit that he was seeing his side of things but Tony was quick to discourage the dragon-boy from starting to form any special feelings for her. They hung back a while and discussed, and Crispo asked Tony about his change of hair, and how he got it to assume its gravity-defying style. Tony explained to him that he uses his hat to make it stay that way.

When Crispo points out that Mye may not appreciate his skulking around in th shadows, Tony decides it would be best to talk to her after all. He asks her if she needs an assistant for her spell making, and Mye agrees. Meanwhile, Crispo approaches them with a hangnail and asks Mye for a healing kiss. Feeling a little bit envious, Tony asks Crispo to hurt him so he can receive a kiss as well. Crispo refuses until Tony threatens him, so he gives in, kicking Tony square in the junk. Tony of course, does not request that kiss after all.

Later in the day Tony is helping Mye with dinner and Mye asks him to bring her brother's supper downstairs for her. When she turns her back to grab a beverage for him, Tony is threatened by a menacing-looking Zeno, who tells him he knows what he's thinking about HIS girlfriend, and threatens to rip his eyes out. So Tony books it downstairs to avoid a confrontation. While downstairs, he delivers the soup to Hex and realizes that his new hairdo seems to be more than a fashion decision, he's experimenting on himself to help his sister! Tony wants to help too so he offers his services to Hex as well, but he turns him down, telling him that his reasons for wanting to help Mye aren't as pure as his own. Tony doesn't seem to grasp what Hex is saying about his dedication, so Hex removes his shirt to show Tony that his body is a roadmap of pain: scars, cuts and stitches, some of them fresh, for various things that he needed to do to help his sister. Tony was shocked, but not deterred as he kept bothering Hex about it. Hex just teased him about it and said he'd consider it.

As Tony was leaving Hexavier's room, he ran into Zeno in the hallway. Quite upset about what he'd told him earlier, Tony snarled at him that he would not be threatened by Zeno's jealous paranoia and threats. Zeno seemed to not know what Tony was talking about, and asked the alp if he could have some more gummi bears for Mye. Tony told him that he was going to cut off his supply here, from now on he should get his own candy for his own girlfriend. Tony produced the gummi bears from his trunk, and Zeno grabbed his arm with a threatening smile. But Tony didn't feel all that threatened by Zeno, he'd fought with this wimp before...until Zeno revealed that he'd been hiding a hammer behind his back this whole time and introduced it to his face. It knocked his hat clean off, and when he tried to pull himself up on the trunk Zeno nailed his hand to it with an iron nail. Like many fay types, an alp has an aversion to iron and he could not pull it out himself. Zeno took his hat and the gummi bears and left Tony nailed to the chest, hinting that he intended to do something questionable with Mye and then come back down to finish Tony off.

After Zeno left, it was a little while before help arrived. Hexavier happened to be walking through the hall and Tony called out for help, and Hexavier removed the nail from Tony's hand. Tony was about to go get his revenge when Hexavier told him he would give him something to help: his pendant. He warned Tony not to kill Zeno, stating that he wasn't himself at the moment.

Tony arrived just in time to find Zeno using his hat to get into Mye's head and manipulate her emotions. Zeno noticed the pendant and mocked Tony, inviting him to make the first move. But he didn't count on Mye taking Tony's side and smacking the hat off his head, giving Tony the advantage when he caught it in midair. Tony became a mist and entered Zeno's mind and was shocked to find that it was like he was dreaming instead of awake, and found himself quite lost and unable to control Zeno. He assumed his wolf form and proceeded to tear his way through an unending army of identical, insane Zenos, that were all threatening him that the Master would come and be quite upset about his intrusion. Tony ignored these threats, ripping through the Zeno army with ease, until that one they called the Master started speaking to him. And things got worse when this Master proved that he was no weakling when it came to nightmares when he turned Tony back to his alp body. And then the reason he could do this was revealed: he wasn't facing off against Zeno but an intruder in his mind!

Tony confronted the specter wearing Zeno's face, and demanded to know who he was. The Master revealed that he lost his body long ago and was a spirit who attached himself to his former zombie servants when they refused to let him take over their bodies. The Master had been using Mye as a means to procure a new host body by enchanting her with a love spell that made her more attractive to males, and he told Tony that he was merely another hapless sap affected by her spell. Apparently Zeno's recent jealousy of other males (and more favorable hosts) was making the Master impatient, so he decided to take matters into his own hands and simply possess him until he could find a better way out, and in the meantime ruin his life out of spite. But Tony didn't buy that he was under any spells and tried to escape the Master when he gave him a chance to make a run for it, but the Master used Hexavier's pendant to scorch Tony's chest with a magical blast. When Tony was knocked back, he blundered into Zeno's "center", where he'd been kissing a dream-Mye this whole time. Now that he'd woken Zeno up, Tony knew where he was, but Zeno was starting to panic. He revealed that he'd made a deal with Master to spare Mye, but Tony told him that the Master had lied to him and was going to betray that promise and Zeno was foolish to lay down and let the Master take him over. The Master found Tony again and told him that for his intrusion, he'd take his body now and us it to kill Mye, stating that his feelings were indeed genuine. Now knowing his center though, Tony allowed the Master to attach himself to him as he ejected himself from Zeno's mind. It looked like the Master's plan worked, as the violently ejected alp picked himself up and began to advance on Mye, until Tony held his head and collapsed to the floor. He gave the pendant to Mye to use to protect herself if the plan failed.

Tony intended to take the Master out by any means, even if that meant letting him kill them both. Tony turned the Master to a ran in his mind and chased him down as an assortment of predatory creatures, before he finally captured him and started demanding answers. The Master revealed that Zeno was already messed up and that just made him easier to take over. But before Tony could get any answers, Kavonn removed the evil spirit from Tony's body.

In the aftermath of the fight, Mye offered to give him a healing kiss to heal his various serious wounds, but he declined when Zeno started to awake. Tony tried to go back to his room when the adrenaline from the fight wore off and his pain brought him to his knees, and Tony looked like he was going to die until Hexavier showed up with a much-needed healing elixir. Hexavier warned him to be careful about Mye and not to do something stupid and get himself killed.

Mye came downstairs shortly to return her brother's pendant and to thank Tony for his help, and to check on his wounds. Her motive, besides checking up on her friend, was to ask him about the way he looked without his hat. Tony was afraid that she'd ask what went on in Zeno's mind, and he didn't want to lie to her, but he thought it would be worse if she knew the truth: that she had a dark soul attached to her for so long that was trying to use her to possess someone else.

Good little Helper

Arc Start

A short interlude before the party arc started, a noticeably more cheerful Tony ("she called me cuuuuute!") is up to his pranks again, this time scaring the pants (if he wore any) off Menu with a joke involving visual puns and giant beetles. When Menu threw his sub at Tony, he decided to clean it up...good move! Mye saw him making an effort to clean a mess instead of leaving it for her, and was quite pleased, giving Tony a sweet peck on the cheek for his efforts.

When Mannick gets stung by a bee, Tony lets him borrow his hat for a moment to calm him down. Fun time with the hat was cut short when Tony realised that Mannick could read his mind when it was on his head.

Neverending Party

Arc Start

Everyone is getting ready for the party, and Tony sees Mye's got a rather lovely outfit on and he's stunned. But he's not going to be the one enjoying her company tonight, so he decides to hang out with the other wallflowers by the buffet. Tony steals away with the trail mix and separates the gummi bears out, intending to get at least one dance with Mye. But his plan is foiled when Zeno spots him and sees the cup of candy, and brings them to Mye himself. Tony decides that sitting around pouting isn't doing any good, so he decides to pull a prank he learned from TV: spike the punch! But Tony forgets that just like relationship advice, TV is not the best of teachers, and finds the punch is already alcoholic. So he decides to get drunk and make his own fun. Drunk Tony tries to dispense relationship advice to Menu, destroys a bead dress, and makes a mess of the buffet table before a bored and lonely Mye finds him and asks him to keep her company while her boyfriend goes to the meeting. Tony is overjoyed! But he's also feeling that couple of drinks and that binge at the buffet table catch up to him...and nearly vomits his "feelings" all over Mye. He takes it to the men's room, where he empties his guts and then, utterly depressed that he embarrassed himself, goes for another hit of the flask and passes out on the floor. While he was reeling a weasel-demon makes off with his tarnkappe. When Mye comes in to rescue him, he's totally out of it from drinking on an empty stomach, and starts trying to make moves on her. Mye fends off the over-affectionate alp and lets him flop to the floor, and then helps him get his hat back. She didn't let him put it back on, wisely enough, and takes him to Kavonn to babysit when she hears that Zeno is not in the meeting yet. Hexavier ends up carrying the drunken and hungover alp home at the end of the night.

Alps a-double

Arc Start

The party is over and Hexavier has given Tony quite the lecture after hearing about his behavior with his sister at the party. As such, Tony has been avoiding Mye ever since. When a strange, hat-wearing young lady appears at the door, the crew assumes the alp damsel is here for Tony. It turns out she's here for Kavonn, but since he's not home, they decide to let the alps get acquainted in the meantime. While walking in the yard, Tony notices Mye and ignores Yiska's chatty banter to stare lovelorn at her while she works in her garden. Yiska teases him, makes a comment about the size of Mye's "tarnkappe" (doesn't realize at first that Mye's not an alp-ette!) and then transforms to look like Mye to get Tony's attention. Sadly, Tony took this gesture the wrong way and pops her hat clear off! Kavonn showed up just in time to give the insulted alp time to cool off (well, with a klonk on the head from his staff too) and tells him not to be a jerk to everyone else just because of his unrequited feelings for Mye.

As he is heading back to the house, Mye spots him and asks him to go downtown and retrieve two chickens for a special birthday dinner she intends to prepare for Charby. Tony agrees and heads off post-haste. Tony assumes an adult human disguise at the butcher's shop, and when the birds are packaged up he decides to thank the butcher for his kind mime jokes by scaring the apron off him, turning into his leering wolf-form and making off with the chickens for free. Blaine catches wind of this mid-day werewolf, and sends Victor after it. Victor finds Menu (his first assumption) in a garbage alleyway and asks him what Tony is doing downtown. A little incentive gets Menu to spill the beans, and having cut Tony off ahead of the path, he spots the alp strolling along his way with the two reported missing meatbirds. Victor scolds Tony, and demands to know why he is causing trouble downtown instead of being cautious about hiding his monstrous identity. Tony doesn't respect Victor much, so he decides to avoid it and turns invisible and attempts to duck around him. Bad move, Victor was too quick for him and snatched his hat right off, immediately reverting the alp to his absolute default state thanks to the magic-intensive disguise he was using. Tony tries to use the puppy-eyes on Victor to get his hat back, but Victor shows that he's no slouch in supernatural research and demands his "wish" from the alp for the return of his hat. Not wanting Menu to hear too much, Tony denies that a deal can be made until Victor tosses a stick of jerky down the hill for the werewolf to chase. They take a walk and talk on the way back to the cabin, and Victor lays it out for Tony that he better learn to respect him. Victor makes Tony promise not to set foot in town again, knowing that the alp would be bound to the promise, but Tony resists. He has to find Mye's wand first! So Victor softens it a bit and says that he can do it after he finds the wand, but only if there's no more trouble like with the butcher. Victor then suggests that Tony check his boss, Blaine, to find out if he knows anything. He knows that Blaine has a large collection of magic items and may know where the wand is if he doesn't simply have it himself. Tony is quite terrified by the idea of approaching a vampire hunter, much to Victor's indignation!

Tony finally arrives home with the chickens, and since he usually sleeps through the day, he's feeling quite tired. Zeno suggests Tony give it a rest...or did he say get some rest? Either way, Tony heads downstairs for some sleep while dinner is prepared. Zeno awakens him later for the meal, and when Tony emerges Zeno is waiting in the hall. A little spooked from last time, Tony is rightfully cautious when he sees that Zeno has his hands behind his back, hiding something. Zeno is embarrassed when he realizes what has gotten into Tony, and reveals that he was trying to give him a gift: a cane with a bird on it, not the same as the one he'd been given in his life, but the thought was clearly there. Tony felt incredibly guilty for yelling at Zeno now. And apparently he was still on edge when Yiska tried to warn him about something, because he took the entirely wrong meaning when she asked him how much Mye knew about his alp biology! Embarrassed and scared of getting outed on his feelings for Mye (with Charby standing right there and all) Tony freaked out on her, telling her not to insinuate anything unsavory about his good friend again. Yiska decided to let him take his chances with dinner, of course.

As it turns out, Mye made Lemon Chicken for dinner because it didn't have garlic in it, but didn't realize that alps have an aversion to lemons, and Tony leaves the party sputtering and gagging after Hex knocks a chunk of the lemony meat out of his throat. Hexavier later comes down to lecture Tony for being stupid about dinner, paying too much attention to Mye than to what was on his plate, but Tony cuts his rant short when he reveals that he has a lead on Mye's wand. Hex changes his tune when he hears the news, but Tony shuts him down for not warning him about the evil dinner.

The Trap Room

Arc Start

Current arc. Tony arrives at the hunter's headquarters where Blaine happens to live out of. Since there's no window to his room, Tony has to go in through the roof on the top floor and sneak under Blaine's bedroom door. Of all the protections displayed out on the door, Blaine had not anticipated a visit from the German-native alp. Tony found the hunter boss sleeping, and reached into his mind and found that indeed this man knew where the wand was, in fact he may have it! But before Tony can pry further, he is interrupted by another visitor to Blaine's room: the vampire, N. Obviously possessive of his prey, N attacks Tony, who mists himself before he can be grabbed, but N grabs Blaine's leg instead and wakes the hunter up. Blaine panics and turns on the light, brandishing the cross he was clutching, just in time to see the vampire explode into a cloud of roaches and swarm all over his floor and bed. Blaine pulls out his guns and shoots a few roaches that make for the only exit under the door as a panicked, invisible Tony who was also trying to make for the door, stepping on roaches as he went and leaving a pretty visible trail while he was at it. He ducked behind a cabinet before Blaine could get another shot at him, with his exit so close but so far. He watched helplessly as Blaine removed his shirt and stuffed it under the door, blocking the alp's only way out of the room. N, assuming the form of a rat, ducked out of the room the way he came in: through an iron grate over the heating vent, that Tony could not use or even hide inside due to his aversion to iron. After discovering N's purpose for the visit (delivering Blaine's long-dead father's severed head), Blaine and Tony spent a long, tense night awake, waiting for one or the other to give. When morning came, Blaine finally left the room, removing the shirt from the threshold of the door. But when the excited alp tried to make his escape, he found that Blaine had shoved it back in from the other side to keep whatever roaches still in the room inside, and Tony too. His stomach began to betray him, gurgling with hunger since Tony skipped the lemon dinner Mye had served, and forgetting to eat something else (didn't have much appetite at the time!). Tony noticed that there was some garlic in the room that could settle his groaning belly, but then realized after eating an entire pungent herb that now Blaine could locate him by stink now!

Tony's abilities

As an alp, Tony's abilities are all from his hat, save perhaps one: the Evil Eye, which even a hatless alp seems to be able to use.

Using his hat Tony is an accomplished shape-shifter, only limited in that he can physically grow to the size of a large horse and perhaps no larger, though there are no such limits whilst inside the mind of a dreamer! He can also become invisible and turn into mist. When he assumes any of his animal forms, his hat does not change to blend into the form but rather stays the same, though it does scale with his body size. Tony prefers a large wolfish dog form.

Using his hat, Tony has altered his appearance to look less "cute" to his friends and others. When his hat is removed, he slowly reverts back to his original appearance as the hat's magic fades. If he was assuming a more magic-intensive form at the time (like for instance when he assumed a human disguise to steal chickens from downtown during the daylight) and his hat was suddenly removed, he would revert to limp hair and big blue eyes straight away. But since his body is more used to his preferred physical alterations, removing his hat when he's not doing anything just results in his disguise slowly morphing back within a matter of minutes.

Before he received his Tarnkappe, Tony had a more human, though sickly looking appearance. His large pupils, ashen skin tone and pointed ears were a side affect of his bond with his magic hat.


However, he is not without weaknesses either. Alps are allergic to lemons and iron, and if their hat is lost or stolen, they cannot use their powers. An alp can only exit a room the way they entered (good for him there's only one door on cabin!) and he can easily be "bottled" in a room if the exit is blocked or sealed by any means.

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